Thursday, April 26, 2012

Horror In Pink





Congratulations to Mary C., the winner of Barbara's giveaway. Thank you to all who participated.

When I first started to satisfy my taste for blood on paper I threw myself into horror writing with a passion. After a humiliating entrance into the genre, and on the advice of Stephen King, I turned to Comedy – Mystery, Suspense, Romance. It was a much better fit. :)

It was my first horror writers’ conference. I was jazzed at the thought of rubbing elbows with some of my heroes of horror, both wet and dry. I was going to meet with writers who possessed the gift for tormenting their fans with chilling tales. I read the roster of famous and infamous authors, dropped my registration form in the mail, and looked forward to the four day event.

The World Horror and Fantasy Conference would be held in Providence on Halloween weekend. There would be a main conference, breakout meetings, and a final banquette. My wardrobe was basic black; but some sissy-demon took possession of my mind and body as I set out to buy a new outfit for the conference.

Up until that date (and ever since) I have never owned a single pink garment.  I’m not a “pink.” I’m a black or turquoise, never pink. Somewhere between my house and the shops I began to channel someone else. She must have been some fru-fru lady with ringlets in her hair and rosy cheeks. She probably wore five-inch heels and perfume. Whoever she was, she looked like me and used my credit cards. She returned home with a pink dress. It wasn’t just a pink dress… it had a huge lace collar. 

A few days later I arrived at the World Horror Conference, went up to my room, and changed into the dress. I came back down to the Conference ballroom. Everyone was dressed in black. The Los Angeles  crowd looked like Tim Burton sketches from Nightmare Before Christmas. I stood out like a wedding cake at a cemetery. 

A fairly well-known horror writer started to play eye-hockey with me. He stared. I stared back. He was a guest on a panel discussing blood and gore. He sat high on the dais, but kept sneaking peeks at me. I was a lone “pastel” in a sea of darkness. When the discussion was over, he came to me salivating with curiosity.  We sat in the hotel bar and he peppered me with questions about my life. I thought perhaps my natural charm was showing.  It never occurred to me that I was such an oddity in pink I might show up as a victim in his next book.  I spent the rest of the day under the microscope of other authors of the macabre. One after another they queued up to spend time with me. I was suddenly surprisingly popular in pink.

The following night there came a knock on my hotel room door.  Two of the female horror groupies stood there.  One placed a crumpled tiara on my head. The other handed me a homemade trophy. They declared me the “Honorary B---ch” of the Conference. “If you weren’t so nice, we’d hate you. Every guy here is following you. Don’t you dare wear pink to another conference!”

I didn’t.  I don’t. I never will.

Find Barbara at:

Barbara will be awarding a set of digital books (The Secret Diary of Alice in Wonderland, Age 42 and Three-Quarters and Wendy and the Lost Boys) to one lucky commenter!

Giveaway ends 10pm EST April 26th. Please supply your email in the post. You may use spaces or full text for security. (ex. jsmith at gmail dot com) If you do not wish to supply your email, or have trouble posting, please email justromanticsuspense @ gmail.com with a subject title of JRS GIVEAWAY to be entered in the current giveaway. 

17 comments:

  1. That is hilarious. What a wonderful anecdote.:)

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  2. That's my girl! I can just see that happening.

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  3. What a great story, channeling "Pretty in Pink" to a horror conference. You did it proud, Barb.

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  4. Love this story! Takeaway lesson: Pink. Everywhere. Every day. ;-)

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  5. Elle, Why is it that nothing says romance like pink? Nothing says horror quite like black. Pink and black. Good and Plenty!

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  6. Dear God, this wasn't the 80's, was it? :) ButchDurbin@Charter.net

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  7. Cherie,
    No... why was there another pink dress at a Horror Conference? Do tell! :)

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    1. I was just thinking you had that Pretty in Pink thing going on, and that lace collar reeks of the 80's-lol. God puts the funniest things in our heads but few of us tune in and listen. Aren't you glad you did? (Loved the story!)

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    2. Cherie,
      Thank you! That's right! it was like Pretty in Pink. I just oozed precious and perky. A typical horror story victim.

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  8. Great post. Barbara, your writing is always so funny and enjoyable!

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  9. Loved the read, thanks for sharing!

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  10. Hilarious story, Barbara! Wendy and the Lost Boys is a fantastic read! My kind of book. Over-the-top funny. (Up-You-Go Funny?)Loved it.

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    1. Anne, Thank you. I'm struggling to come up with something equally as funny as "UpUGo" for Zo White.
      I'm working on it!

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  11. *sniggers uncontrollably*
    This wouldn't ever happen to me, I hate pink. But I might get a few questions about my deerstalker.

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  12. The person you channeled on your shopping trip obviously knew how you could attract attention at the conference. Loved the post!

    jtcgc at yahoo dot com

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  13. Very enjoyable post.

    bn100candg(at)hotmail(dot)com

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